Name Change Process (Virginia, USA)
A lot of stuff in this process was unclear, forms/instructions conflicted, and not knowing what to expect triggered a lot of anxiety. A friend suggested that I publish my experiences online somewhere to help others in a similar position, so that’s what this site is.
Hi - My name is Max Crunch and I have anxiety. I wasn't given this name at birth, I got it from the side of a taco box. (I've never needed to use my middle name in my entire life, it's fine.) It was an 8-month long ordeal changing my name everywhere, stretched out mainly due to needing space to process the anxiety that came along with everything.
Here is what it's like to change your name:
You have to fill out many forms, make several phone calls, go into places with rigid rules (probably during your work hours), and everyone expects you to know what you're doing because there is guidance for it everywhere.
Except the official government website on the topic has conflicting information within its own site, so you don't know what to do.
In addition to that, less agencies have a process for changing your first and/or middle name. You may confuse people who are used to seeing last-name changes, and they don't know what to do in the case of first-name changes. Sometimes it's a technical system limitation, in that the developers of the software that agency is using didn't consider that a user's first name would ever change. (This is especially often a problem when it comes to changing your primary email, an issue which all name changers face.)
This site is my opportunity to give a space to outlining my experience. It might not help anyone but if it helps just one person I think that's worth it.
For those with anxiety that is triggered by things like this, here's my #1 tip:
Recruit a friend who doesn't have those limitations to help keep you on track. They might research info for you. Perhaps they'll go with you to an appointment. Even if you just use them to give someone a status update and keep things moving, it could be immensely helpful with staying on top of the moving pieces.
